Have you ever lived on a rural island paradise?...me either...so the last two weeks have come with a learning curve...
For example...I actually believed I was being greeted by bird songs the night I arrived...only to discover later that the fire alarm was chirping...this led to locating a shed in total darkness...carting a ladder up a flight of stairs...and discovering it wasn't the battery...it was the unit...that had died...
I thought I was being very smart when I ordered an exact replacement from Amazon...which would mean no need to change out the base that connected to the ceiling...this is how I learned...only after I had placed the order...that Amazon ships to the island primarily via the United States Postal Service...which would not have been a problem...except my hostess was having her mail held at the post office...
The replacement unit arrived (which I would tell you about in hilarious detail but it might get the postmaster in trouble)...and I wasn't tall enough to reconnect what I had easily disconnected...this is when I learned that there is great value in rural living...in knowing a wonderful group of people who help each other out...thank you Fell...yes, that is her name...my rescuer...
And speaking of the female gender, I had a conversation with someone in town...who shall remain nameless...who shared that she had begun dating...I commented that there must not be a lot of prospects in this vast rural landscape...at which point she elaborated in some detail...explaining she is dating someone who spends time both on the island and on the mainland...
When I asked her what difference that made, she parried with some surprise in her voice..."Haven't you heard what we women on the island say about dating men on the island?"...I said apparently I hadn't...at which point she leaned toward me...lowered her voice to just above a whisper...and said "We have two sayings. The first one is: you don't date, you just take your turn"...then she deadpanned..."and the second one is: the odds are good, but the goods are odd."
That's when I laughed so hard I thought I might pee my pants...which brings me to the third learning experience...
I was driving to the local harvest festival when I turned down the radio long enough to notice strange noises emanating from my new-to-me car...the one that has only 7,000 miles on it...I immediately pulled over to the side of the road and popped open the hood...like I might actually be able to to do something to fix it...that's when I realized the entire engine compartment is segmented into sections...each of which is neatly covered in secured, black plastic protectors...preventing any possibility of easily seeing where a problem might exist...
So I did what anyone like me would do on a weekend when they have a car problem and don't know a local mechanic...I got back in the car and drove off...mercifully, the sound was gone...which was the moment I realized I had been hearing critters scampering around under the hood somewhere...
No wonder my hostess had written...in a note that was awaiting my arrival...asking me to start her car and let in run...saying that I might smell mothballs...that I shouldn't worry...that it was just an old sock full of them she stores in her engine compartment to keep the mice away...and I now have my own first-hand knowledge that this actually works...
